I am dealing with infertility.
In honor of National Infertility Awareness Week – wait, what?! Yes, apparently there is an awareness week for EVERYTHING these days (Brain Awareness Week, Asbestos Awareness Week, World Hearing Aid Awareness Week, National Farm Animals Awareness Week, I Have Bunions on Both Feet Awareness Week – okay, maybe I made up that last one).
Anywhoo, back to what I was saying…I thought I’d give some tips and pointers when it comes to infertiles like me because really, who talks about infertility during 4th of July barbecues anyway? NO ONE DOES, because it’s a taboo subject, everyone feels uncomfortable about it, the awkward silence pushes out the noise of once cackling purple-haired ladies and everyone begins to stare at their plates in hopes that Bob will call out for more hot dog eaters to pick up the semi-burnt weenies at the grill.
Let’s just say I’m going to attempt to do a little educatin’. You can thank me later…or not, and wish I had just kept my mouth shut.
Scenario No. 1:
At a party celebrating the arrival of Chester and Tammy’s 3rd baby, Rhonda walks up to Susie and suddenly blurts out, “So Susie, when are you and John gonna get your act together?! You ain’t gettin’ any younger!” (as Rhonda points to the baby).
DON’T: Please don’t ever question when someone is going to start having kids. Yes, some people choose not to have any. But 95% of the time, they are struggling with infertility. It doesn’t matter if they’ve been married for only 1 year or 7+ years, it hurts all the same. And for the love of all that is sacred, don’t ask them if they are infertile!!! Frankly, this topic is none of your business in the first place.
DO: Find something else to talk about at the party. There are thousands of other things you could talk about with Susie besides bringing up the fact that she hasn’t popped out any kiddos yet. Susie will appreciate the good conversation.
If you ARE Susie…
DON’T: Say what is going through your head, forgive Rhonda for she knows not what she does.
DO: Churn out one of your polite answers as usual, “It’ll happen when the time is right!”; “Hopefully soon!”; “Oh, I know! I can’t wait to have one of my own!” Wait until you’ve left the premises to start bawling, it just makes everyone feel uncomfortable and it’ll be harder to face everyone the next day at Kimmie’s baby shower.
Yay, I hope I’ve made you aware!